Monthly Archives: January 2012



I’m showing my son to the blog world for the first time. He just turned two months when this photo was taken. My son, he is very precious to me. I look at him and see myself again as an infant. He got my forehead, my small thin lips and cute chin. His eyes are combination of his dad’s and mine; his cheekbones from his father as well as his nose. I still cannot say if his complexion is from me or Tope because sometimes he turns so red then fair.

In the first week after I had given birth to him via cs, I had difficulties doing the role of a mother. When Evo & I arrived in my in-laws home from the hospital, I couldn’t help but cry. I felt downright depressed because I thought I wouldn’t see my mama for a long time because of Evo. I didn’t know how to take care of him. Breastfeeding him was not enough; he still cries even after I breastfed him and that only added to my misery. I felt helpless being alone with Evo. I didn’t know how to stop him from crying at the top of his lungs. When mama and tita Bless visited me there, I once again burst into tears. I realized how hard becoming a mother was and I know I badly needed mama’s help. I felt so sorry for all the heartaches I’ve caused her. She’s still the one I could run to. Thank you ma.

Lucky me I skipped past labor pains, didn’t feel any of those. I was given instructions to undergo cs procedure due to oligohydramnios(low amniotic fluid) which I diligently obeyed to save Evo. Moving around with a cut in my lower abdomen was no joke. I cringe in pain every time I made an effort to sit, stand or walk. I had heavy bleeding for more than 7weeks and it took me 54 long days before I finally felt normal. Now, do I want to have a child again after Evo? I don’t know. I’m still in trauma and I just want to take care and love him unconditionally. I couldn’t imagine dividing my time for him and his siblings. Sorry bi, I am happy with Evo alone-no more additional babies alright?